Caregiving Questions

What is the difference between dementia and Alzheimer’s disease?
Dementia describes a group of symptoms that consist of loss of intellectual function which includes but is not limited to loss of memory, judgment and complex motor skills. Each type of dementia is characterized by different structural or pathologic changes in the brain. Specific symptoms are, in large part, reflective of the type of dementia and the part of the brain that has been affected.

Alzheimer’s disease is the most common cause of dementia in people over age 65 and represents well over half of all dementia’s. Relatively speaking, Alzheimer’s tends to run a slower, more predictable course beginning with mild memory impairment and progressing as more and more of the brain is affected.

My loved one was just diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. How do we prepare for the future?
Not only is planning for the future critically important, it can be empowering for both the person with Alzheimer’s and for family members when so many things feel beyond your control right now. Some important planning considerations include: finding a physician and other professionals that can meet current and future needs; getting legal and financial affairs in order; learning as much as you can about the disease and its progression; becoming familiar with community resources; rethinking your loved one’s living situation as you plan for anticipated changes; and, reinforce both your friendships and support system as well as your loved one’s. Early Stage Support Groups and Family and Caregiver Support Groups can be an invaluable source of strength, support and hope throughout this journey. Contact Family Alliance to find a support group near you.

How can my loved one with dementia and I communicate better?
Because the brain of a person with dementia may no longer be able to learn, store new facts and participate in the give and take of conversation, the responsibility of improving communication falls to those who have the ability to change the ways they communicate. You will have to change your expectations of how your loved one is able to communicate with you, keeping in mind that the emotion is still there. With positive regard and respect, use a gentle touch and call them by name to get their attention; use a calm tone of voice; eliminate background noise; use nonverbal cues; actively listen --- and never underestimate the power of loving touch. Touch can be pleasant and reassuring, and may decrease anxiety, agitated behavior and depression. All people are different, however, and your loved one may not like to be touched. Gently offer your hand and act according to your loved one’s response.

My father’s behavior is becoming more and more problematic. How can I deal with his challenging behaviors?
All forms of dementia cause changes in behavior that may be uncharacteristic and unpredictable. Behaviors can include confusion, agitation, repetition, suspicion, aggression, wandering and sleeplessness. These behaviors can lead to misunderstandings, frustration, tension and anger between the person with dementia and their caregiver. It is important to examine the behavior and its possible triggers. Behaviors may be related to physical discomfort, reaction to medication, overstimulation, unfamiliar surroundings, frustration due to their inability to communicate effectively, or feeling overwhelmed by complicated or difficult tasks. Don’t take the behavior personally, focus on the emotion behind the behavior and stay calm. One of the most important measures you can take to decrease or prevent some problematic behaviors is to take care of yourself.

We have therapists and nurses who can provide information, insight, guidance, counseling and practical advice. And, while each person and situation is unique, our support groups will connect you with others who can share what has worked for them.

I love my husband very much and sincerely want to take care of him but I feel so overwhelmed. I’m tired, irritable, tearful and angry all the time. I don’t want this to be my last memory of our time together. What can I do?
Your reactions are perfectly normal. Caring for someone who has dementia can be overwhelming, exhausting and extremely stressful no matter how much you love them. Caregivers frequently report high levels of stress. Stress symptoms can include anxiety, depression, irritability, anger, inability to concentrate and physical health problems. Left unchecked, stress continues to build and emotional and physical symptoms increase. Compassionately caring for yourself needs to be at least as important as caring for your spouse.

Our Adult Day program can provide activities and opportunities for individuals to socialize as well as respite for care providers. Professionally trained therapists can work with you to understand and alleviate your feelings of depression, anger, anxiety and sadness and help you identify healthy ways for you to provide essential self-care. Our support groups can serve as a vital social link and a connection with others with whom you can share your experience and rediscover the power of laughter!